Whether you are speaking with your peers or delivering an important speech, you have to ensure that the words coming out of your mouth are well-thought-out. Apart from ensuring that you say the right thing, thinking before you speak also creates the impression that you understand the subject matter and you have a rich vocabulary.
But how do you think on your feet? This article offers you some useful tips on how to think before you speak.
Importance Of Thinking Before You Speak
One of the most important life and social skills is thinking well. While intellect is naturally acquired, there are different ways of enhancing it. You can learn how to think well before speaking. Being able to process your words in your mind before they come out of your mouth will improve your social and professional life easier and more successful.
You can’t be careless with your words because they can easily make or break. You can help or hurt people with what you say to them. For instance, when you’re consoling someone who is grieving, your words can bring them solace or hurt them even more. Here are the main reasons why you should think before you speak.
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Be In Control Of The Conversation
Processing your thoughts before you speak influences your speech, tone, and attitude when communicating. You should be able to pause for a moment and think about what to say by assessing your words and feelings. This gives you full control of the conversation because your mind is clear on what to say.
When you analyze your thoughts and feelings, you’re able to speak from a position of logic than emotions. For example, if you are angry, sad, anxious, or stressed, it’s important to take moment to think about what you want to say so that your words are not controlled by emotions and feelings.
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To Inspire, Not Destroy
As noted above, words carry a lot of energy and power. They can easily heal or hurt depending on the kind of energy they hold. Therefore, you should take time to think about what you want to say so that you can inspire instead of hurting the receivers of your message. One word can influence the expression of genes that control physical and emotional tension.
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Portray The Right Personality
Your words reflect who you are. So, before you throw words around carelessly, know that they’re likely to portray you in a bad light. Choose your words carefully to bring out your actual personality. For instance, if you are going through a job interview, the words you utter will help your potential employer the person you are.
Even if you are speaking to your loved ones, you need to process your thoughts carefully and choose the right words that will show them that you are considerate. You need to show people that you consider their feelings. Your real character comes out when you speak.
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Say What You Mean
Anxiety, anger, and stress can cloud your thoughts, making you say things you don’t want to say. That’s why you should take a moment to process your thoughts before you say anything, especially when you are not in the right state of mind. By collecting your thoughts before you speak, you’ll be able to avoid blunders like yelling or raising your voice.
The logical part of your brain is likely to shut down and allow the emotional part to take over when you are emotional. Therefore, it’s important to scan and filter your thoughts for the right words so that you don’t say what you don’t intend to say. Sometimes it’s difficult to hear yourself when you’re worked up.
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Prove That You’re Considerate
Searching for the right words before you open your mouth is an important skill because it shows you are considerate. Part of the reason why your words matter so much is to show the person you are speaking with that their feelings matter. So, take time to contemplate what you say and how to say it.
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Make Other People Listen More And Talk Less
When you think about what you say before you say it, you’re able to say the right things thus encouraging the other person to listen more and talk less. People tend to pay more attention to you when they like what you are saying. But if you rush to say things that aren’t well-thought-out, you risk saying the wrong things thereby triggering reactions.
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Avoid Offensive Words
If you don’t choose your words carefully, you risk offending the other person. Words have different connotations and can therefore be interpreted differently depending on the prevailing situation. So, instead of having to apologize when the damage has already been done, you should take the time to choose your words carefully.
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You Can’t Take Back Words
Don’t hurry to air your views or grievances without processing your words carefully because it’s very hard to take back your words. Even if you apologize, the damage may already have been done. So, to avoid this scenario, you should analyze your words carefully before you utter them.
How To Think Before You Speak
Perhaps you’ve been a victim of saying the wrong things to the wrong people. This is an embarrassing situation that can have a major effect on your self-esteem and personality. That’s why you should take time to think about what you want to say. Here are useful tips on how to think before you speak.
1. Accuracy Of Your Statement
If you’re not sure of the accuracy of what you are about to say, then it’s better to not say it. For instance, if you are quoting someone, you have to be sure that what you are saying is accurate and true.
Whether you are reporting what someone else told you or what you read, take your time to analyze the accuracy of the words and the overall statement. So, the first thing you need to ask yourself is: How true is my statement?
2. Use Of Your Statement
Before you utter a word to somebody, make sure it’s helpful to them. So, analyze your words and process your thoughts carefully before you open your mouth so that you can choose useful words. For instance, if you are consoling someone who’s grieving, your words need to carry the right message that will help them to calm down and deal with the stressful situation.
Whether you’re catching up with a lost friend or answering questions at a job interview, the words that come out of your mouth should help you to express yourself appropriately. Useful words should help you to put your point across and enable the receiver of the message to understand your words.
3. Affirmation
Although your conversation shouldn’t be a self-aggrandizing session, your words should nevertheless affirm the person you are speaking to. This doesn’t necessarily mean paying them compliments. It means affirming them as people worthy of respect. You should always use words that make the other person feel that they matter.
4. Is It Necessary?
Before you say anything, take a moment to consider if it’s necessary. If you don’t think about what you are about to say, you’ll end up saying unnecessary things that you’ll be required to take back and apologize for. Choose words that are helpful and not harmful.
Even if your words aren’t intended to be direct insults, they can still be harmful, both emotionally and mentally. Only use words that are completely necessary. Even when you want to criticize someone, choose essential words.
5. Be Kind
In everything you say, be kind to the other person. Even in the event of a disagreement, you should use kind words. There’s nothing to gain in being belligerent and disrespectful.
Kind words help to build relationships even with your adversaries. Make sure that your words encourage the other person and make their life journey more pleasant and easier. Be charitable, courteous, and considerate in your conversations. It will not only motivate the other person but also improve your character.
6. Be Sincere
Sincerity is a virtue. So, before you speak, analyze your words to ensure they’re sincere. This doesn’t mean that you sugarcoat your word. Rather, your words should help you put across your message in an honest and unsullied way.
You should never use words that mislead the other person. Even if what you are saying isn’t factual, it should, at least, be sincere. It’s better to be perfectly sincere than be perfectly factual.
